It’s difficult to comprehend when tragedy strikes close to home, especially when it involves people you know and care about. This is a reflection on the devastating loss of the Sheer family, who were deeply connected to the author through friendship and family ties.
As a law enforcement officer, the author was accustomed to being on the investigative side of difficult situations. However, the triple murder-suicide involving the Sheer family became a deeply personal tragedy. On May 27, 2014, Mark and Lydia Sheer, along with their 15-year-old daughter Amy, were found dead in their Mission Viejo, California home. The perpetrator was their 21-year-old son and brother, Michael.
The author’s connection to the Sheer family ran deep. He attended the same high school as Mark and Lydia, albeit a few years later. In 1979, his brother Steve married Lydia’s sister, Sandie. In 1986, Mark was the real estate agent who sold the author his first home, which happened to be next door to the Sheer’s residence. They were friends, neighbors, and family.
Although they moved away from each other after a few years, they remained in contact through occasional family gatherings. Their communication increased when the author began In the Dirt Ministry in 2004, as they shared a love for Jesus and enjoyed riding dirt bikes. The news of the deaths of Mark, Lydia, and Amy at the hands of Michael was devastating. The author mourned for his sister-in-law, Sandie, who lost a dear friend and sister, Lydia. He grieved for Sandie’s mother, Rachel, who lost her daughter, primary caretaker, and best friend. He ached for Mark’s mother, Carol, who discovered her firstborn son, his wife, and their children in such a horrific state. The hope is that God will erase those images from her memory.
The author expressed sadness for both the Sheer and Davis families, who now face the challenge of continuing life after such a profound loss, inflicted by someone they loved and cared for during his 21 years of life. A prayer is offered that whatever tormented Michael will be discovered in others before another mother experiences such a tragedy. The question of where was God on that fateful day arises. The response is that God’s sovereignty is always in control, even when we cannot fully understand His divine plan. Our perspective is temporary, while His is eternal. God did not create the evil that necessitated Jesus’ death, nor did He intervene, even when Jesus prayed to have the cup removed from him. Similarly, God did not author the thoughts in Michael’s mind, nor did He intervene, although He could have. However, the upside of Jesus’ crucifixion was the resurrection, offering hope for others to follow. Mark and Lydia were followers of Jesus, as is the author’s sister-in-law Sandie.
People cope with tragedy in different ways. After the Orange County Sheriff’s Department concluded their investigation, Sandie was granted access to the home. She recounted, “I visited each of their rooms, fell to my knees at each crime scene, and was able to cry deeply, pray and talk with my Savior, thanking Him for receiving them, and asking after their care and mercy for Michael.” This act of praying for them at the scene of the tragedy is a holy moment. The Apostle Paul, a historical figure who once persecuted Christians before becoming one himself, wrote about the resurrection in his first letter to the Corinthians. He emphasized that if Christ has not been raised, then our preaching is in vain and our faith is in vain. But Christ has been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep. Paul was convinced that Jesus’ sacrifice secured his eternal salvation, writing to the Philippians, “For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.”
On May 27, God received His children into glory, and He is present in the form of the Holy Spirit to help us in our grief. He did not abandon the Sheer family but remains available, even if we do not always recognize or welcome His presence. Those who criticize God for not intervening often fail to acknowledge His miraculous interventions or the acts of mercy and generosity performed by others under the guidance of the Holy Spirit. The author expresses weariness with the complaints about the “separation of church and state,” arguing that as long as people perish, the church will remain more relevant than the state. The state is like the perishable body, while the church is like the imperishable body, destined to live on. Mark and Lydia now possess a deeper understanding of theology than they did before. We mourn for ourselves, for the loss of loved ones, but not for them, as they have seen the radiant beauty of their Lord and Savior. Paul assured us that “… to be absent from the body is to be at home with the Lord.”
Since moving to Texas two years prior, the author had lost contact with Mark. Upon checking his email, he discovered a LinkedIn request from Mark dated August 12, 2013, which had gone unnoticed due to an old email address. Coincidentally, this was also the seventh anniversary of the author’s own father’s passing. As a symbolic gesture, the author accepted Mark’s invitation to connect on LinkedIn post-mortem. If Mark could communicate with those still living, he would likely urge others to “Accept Jesus’ invitation to be part of your life. It’s the greatest link of all time.”