This reflection stems from a tragic event and a subsequent observation about how we, as a community, honor our fallen. Sergeant Christopher Kelley of the Hutto Police Department in Texas was killed in the line of duty after a traffic stop escalated. The suspect, initially pulled over for a minor violation, had an outstanding warrant. During the attempted arrest, a struggle ensued, and the suspect managed to escape, striking Sergeant Kelley with the patrol vehicle as he fled. Sergeant Kelley succumbed to his injuries at a nearby hospital.
In a poignant twist of fate, the author of this piece had a contractor at his home the day of the incident. The contractor, a cousin of Sergeant Kelley, shared the firsthand account of the family’s devastating loss. However, amidst the grief, he also recounted a troubling aspect of the funeral service: the overwhelming presence of the law enforcement community inadvertently caused significant inconvenience for elderly and physically challenged family members.
Patrol cars occupied prime parking spaces, and uniformed officers filled the best seats. This well-intentioned show of solidarity, while undoubtedly supportive, resulted in elderly relatives having to navigate considerable distances, some with wheelchairs, to attend the service. The contractor expressed a sentiment that resonated deeply: “It was more about the profession than Chris.” The service, while undoubtedly respectful of the fallen officer’s service, seemed to prioritize the vocation over the individual. There was more respect paid for the badge than the individual wearing it.
This observation serves as a crucial reminder for those involved in planning police funerals and memorial services. While the deceased is undoubtedly a member of a close-knit brotherhood or sisterhood, they are, first and foremost, a member of a family. It is imperative to be sensitive to the needs and desires of the family during this incredibly difficult time. The wishes and needs of the family should be thoughtfully considered while burying one of our brethren. The focus should be on honoring the individual and providing comfort to those who loved them most.
It’s important to remember the human element, the personal loss, and to ensure that our gestures of support do not inadvertently overshadow the grief and needs of the family. Consider designating parking areas specifically for family members, providing accessible seating, and ensuring that the service reflects the individual’s life and personality, not just their profession. Let us strive to honor our fallen in a way that truly respects both their service and their families’ grief.